Mussar - American Mussar

Bay Area Anti-Trafficking Coalition & The Soul Trait of Silence

January 25, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

Judaism teaches that we ought to remain silent unless our words will bring some good into the world—and when we can add to good or subtract from evil by speaking out, we are required to do so. This is the proper balance for the Soul Trait of Silence, allowing us room to hear others when we cannot contribute ourselves, and making sure our voices are raised when those voices can achieve something worthwhile.

Human trafficking is one of the most evil and damaging problems the world is currently facing, and the Bay Area Anti-Trafficking Coalition is raising its voice to help raise awareness of the problem. The trafficking of human lives is only allowed to continue because too many remain silent when they hear about it; despite being widespread even here in the United States, few recognize the extent of this modern-day slave trade.

By bringing together individuals, communities, and nonprofit as well as government organizations, the Bay Area Anti-Trafficking Coalition facilitates the sharing of information and lends a stronger voice to the anti-trafficking movement. It also ensures that spaces are created where other issues can stay in Silence so the focus can remain on the pressing problem of modern human slavery.

Silence requires balance. It is important to listen, and important be heard when there are important things to say. The Bay Area Anti-Trafficking Coalition lives this balance through its actions and its voice, and we are happy to salute them and their cause with a Point of Light Award. To learn more and become involved, please visit them here.

#iAMSilence

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How a Hurricane and Inferno Helped Me Overcome Work Stress

January 22, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

It has been a good week for my book. I saw the first draft of the cover and I love it! And, as the blurbs from various Rabbis, Mussar teachers, and secular leaders roll in, they love it! Wow, I may be onto something here.

I’ll be honest – I’m one of those people who have a hard time hearing praise. At the same time, I am super excited. I have that blood in the water feeling I used to get in college. When I got a good grade, I would stay up all night studying to ace the next one too. I’m too old for that. I don’t want my work thoughts waking me up, and continuing to work all the time will degrade the quality of my life and creativity. The Soul Trait of Order has helped me overcome work stress.

On one level, Order has helped me be organized. I’ve been diligent about my lists and organization. But that has only given me more successes, which add fuel to the drive to keep pushing for more. As a recovering workaholic, I recognize the danger signs.

I found solace in what initially seemed like a very esoteric reading that was assigned in a class I am taking through the Mussar Institute. We read a teaching about Order by Rabbi Aharon Kotler (18911-1962), which was translated for the class by Rabbi Avi Fertig. The reading explains that a mere hair separates an Angel of pure fire, from an Angel of pure water. They are so close, “yet, they do not interfere with one another.”* Rabbi Kotler teaches that it is the Fear of the Divine that holds them apart. I did not find it helpful to think of the Angels as beings with agency, but when I thought of a Divine force field keeping them apart, a light bulb went off. If you are unsure of the Divinity, think of the boundary as a super powerful force field. As I’ll explain in a moment, we have the power to create boundaries with our mind.

Lost? I admit I was at first. Thanks to some work with my study partner, I’ve figured out something very relevant to my current situation. Stepping back, the text is describing two forces of nature that are brought in close proximity, but held apart by a boundary. If the boundary disappeared, they would destroy each other. As my wife pointed out, the boundary lets each fully be itself.

Here I sit, struggling to keep the excitement over my work from spilling into an equally vital home life. I need a boundary. I need Order to keep them apart. With a strong boundary, each part of my life can become more powerful, more focused.

Last night as I was tossing and turning, I meditated on my Divine spark, and asked for help keeping my work excitement in check. I visualized the raging inferno next to a swirling hurricane. Yet an invisible barrier, impenetrable and of infinite strength, held them apart. Please help me contain the work thoughts, and let me sleep.

I slept without waking till an hour before my alarm. Compared to the last few nights, I’ll take it. I am Grateful that Mussar helped me take another small step.

#iAMOrder

Image credits: Inferno by Mário Tomé & Hurricane Jeanne by kakela; both via Flickr CC

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The Alport Syndrome Foundation and the Soul Trait of Humility

January 21, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

The Soul Trait of Humility is one that many struggle with. It requires finding a balance that lets the ego go without denying your own importance and growth. When families affected by Alport Syndrome came together to advocate for themselves in 2007, their actions and the foundation they created struck a perfectly harmonious Humility chord, and American Mussar is pleased to award them with our Point of Light recognition.

Alport Syndrome is a genetic disorder that ultimately leads to kidney failure, and can also cause impairments to vision and hearing. For years, research into this syndrome was limited and there was a lack of advocacy for the many families suffering from this disease. Thanks to the work of the Alport Syndrome Foundation, this is beginning to change.

Humility teaches us that not every situation is about us, and that we shouldn’t always be seeking credit or recognition for our actions—because there are other people and forces involved in everything we accomplish. At the same time, too much Humility can cause us to endure needless suffering, to accept negative situations instead of working to solve them.

The Alport Syndrome Foundation is made up of families who saw themselves as important enough to fight for, but who do not seek personal aggrandizement or recognition for their actions. They are working to end a terrible disease that directly affects them, but from a spirit of self-worth and appropriate action, not from a stance of either victimhood or arrogance.

Their Humility is a lesson for all trying to get their Soul Traits in balance, and American Mussar is happy to donate to such a worthy cause. If you would like to contribute as well, you can do so here.

#iAMHumility

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I’m Glad I Didn’t Win Powerball. Really!

January 14, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

I’m glad that I’ve moved on to practicing the Soul Trait Order this week. I’ve been scrambling around, and need some help to get my schedules and priorities re-established. No, I was not distracted by Powerball fever, although I did watch with a kind of detached fascination. (I was far more drawn in by all of the David Bowie tributes.) In fact, I did not buy a ticket because I feared winning.

My Mussar teacher Alan Morinis once reminded us that for many people, winning the lottery is the worst thing that ever happened to them. I am pretty sure a billion dollars would ruin my life. I couldn’t live in my current house, and would need someplace with more security. Would I need to worry about someone kidnapping my kids? I can imagine people coming out of the woodwork asking for money, and friendships becoming strained. Because of these reasons, I’m Glad I didn’t win Powerball. At the same time, I recognize that I am in a financially secure situation right now, and that if I were living in poverty to struggling to get by, I might take the billion to improve my life situation. I think Mark Cuban summed it up well, saying “If you weren’t happy yesterday, you won’t be happy tomorrow. It’s money. It’s not happiness.”

In addition, several research studies have shown that those with more wealth tend to have less empathy and compassion for others. (Read more here). I have enough trouble with empathy and compassion – the last thing I need is something that could make me less compassionate.

Whoever the winner is, I wish them well. Their spiritual curriculum just got a lot more interesting! For me, it is back to making lists and setting priorities. And, I’m happy to say that this morning I unloaded the dishwasher before breakfast. It always makes the day go better, but lately I haven’t done it.

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Second Harvest and the Loving-Kindness Soul Trait

January 8, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

American Mussar is pleased to award the Second Harvest Food Bank of Santa Clara and San Mateo Counties with a Point of Light award. The work of the SHFB—one of the largest food banks in the country—exemplifies the perfect balance of the soul trait of chesed, or loving-kindness.

Caring for the needy and sharing our bounty with those who are less fortunate is one of the most essential ways we can live the loving-kindness all human beings have in their hearts. It is giving simply to make someone else’s life brighter and better, without any expectation of a reward for the gift or a tangible “return on investment.”

The Soul Trait of Loving-Kindness teaches us that we must care for others as we care for ourselves; that showing compassion for others is a big part of having compassion for ourselves. When this Soul Trait is in balance, we practice proper self-care so we have the resources we need to care for others.

Second Harvest Food Bank accepts donations of food and money from those who are in a position of abundance and able to donate these things; those who receive food from SHFB are encouraged to donate their time when they are able, sorting and distributing food to others. Everyone involved gives what they can, and those in need of assistance receive the help they need.

This is the true spirit of Loving-Kindness, and helps to strengthen the Santa Clara and San Mateo communities and all of the individuals in it. We’re proud to support the Second Harvest Food Bank, and encourage you to do the same here if you are able.

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