American Mussar

21st century Jewish spiritual practice for an authentic and meaningful life

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Sojourn to the Past: The Enthusiasm Soul Trait and the Civil Rights Movement

February 15, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

At a time when racial tensions are higher than they’ve been in generations, and when Americans are being told to fear all manner of “outsiders,” it is important to remember that good intentions are not enough to bring about healing and togetherness—it takes action. For its work inspiring Enthusiasm in today’s youth in regards to the Civil Rights Movement of our nation’s past, American Mussar is happy to recognize Sojourn to the Past with a Point of Light award.

While too much Enthusiasm can lead to rash and ineffective action, most of us tend to suffer from the opposite problem, and a lack of Enthusiasm translates to a lack of meaningful action for even our most strongly held beliefs. While we might all firmly believe that racism is wrong, how many of us are taking the direct action necessary to bring it to an end. Of those who are taking action, how many of us are doing all we can?

Sojourn to the Past takes young students, from middle school through college-age, on a tour through the American South to visit and learn about important sites in the Civil Rights Movement. Recognizing the Enthusiasm and action necessary in this movement of the past helps to inspire greater Enthusiasm today—a time when it is quite clearly needed.

Over the years Sojourn to the Past has received recognition from numerous officials and other prominent figures and organizations, and American Mussar is happy to join those who recognize this organization’s important and action-based work.

To donate to Sojourn to the Past or see how the students in your life can become involved, you can learn more here.

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Filed Under: Enthusiasm, Featured, nine points of light Tagged With: american mussar, civil rights movement, Mussar, Sojourn to the past, soul trait of enthusiasm

How many people know the real you?

February 11, 2016 By Greg Marcus 1 Comment

Large group of people with questionsI had an interesting realization this morning. My Mussar group facilitator asked us to meditate for a few minutes to get in touch with our inner Truth. I let my mind quiet, looked within, and discovered that I am afraid. I’m afraid that the book will flop, and I’m afraid that it will be wildly successful. Wow, talk about setting yourself up to be dissatisfied with any outcome! I feel empowered by having that realization. The book launch will be a big deal for me. Whatever happens, things will change. Now that I hear this internal voice, I can choose how to respond.

Another realization this week: 85% of readers I surveyed feel disconnected from friends and family, or that no one knows the real them. Wow! This is just from a small sample of infrequent readers, but it has made me wonder about the rest of you. Many people have told me that my email newsletter is the only one they are sure to read whenever it comes.

I write about myself, but I don’t know anything about your spiritual journey. I’d love to hear it – please take a few minutes to take this short survey – it will help guide the topics I write about. I’ll let you know the results next week too.

Mussar is all about taking action. When we feel that no one knows us, what is one small action that we can take to let people in? More importantly, what inside is holding us back from making those connections? Many soul traits could be in play, but which soul traits will vary from person to person.

The Real Question, The Real Question is how well do you know yourself? Today I learned something important about myself. Not something I’m happy about, but now that I know I am afraid, I can take action to make sure I don’t derail myself.

How many people know the real you? Do you want more people to know you?

If you have successfully reached out to others, and no longer feel this way, please share your success story below. It will inspire those of us who want to follow your example.

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Filed Under: Featured, Truth Tagged With: I feel disconnected from friends and family, intimacy, no one knows the real me, soul trait truth

The Honor Soul Trait and the Rotary Club of Great Neck, New York

February 10, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

Continuing with our series of charitable donations to groups that exemplify the Soul Traits central to American Mussar, we are proud to announce the Rotary Club of Great Neck, New York as the next recipient of our Point of Light award. Their work with families and others in Great Neck and throughout Long Island exemplifies the Soul Trait of Honor, and we are happy to honor them with this award.

When we honor other, we recognize the Divine Spark we all share, even in our lowest moments. By providing meals to hungry Long Island families and performing other acts of charity and community-building that help to bring people dignity, security, and comfort when they are at their lowest moments, the Rotary Club of Great Neck reminds us that all humans are equally deserving of Honor, and that we must act in order to see that all are honored accordingly.

As an example of their long-running work in the Great Neck community, this past year the Rotary Club provided full Thanksgiving meals to more than 1,000 families in need—an effort supported not only by Rotary Club members but by donations from the larger community as well. American Mussar honors everyone who helped achieve this goal, and the Rotary Club for its many years of similar service and for continuing to organize action that makes us all aware of the Honor we owe each other.

To learn more about the charitable work performed by the Rotary Club of Great Neck, New York, or to volunteer or donate, please visit their site here.

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Filed Under: Featured, Honor, nine points of light Tagged With: american mussar, Mussar, Rotary club, Rotary Club of Great Neck, soul trait of honor

What Not To Say To Someone In Mourning

February 4, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

What Not To Say To Someone In Mourning
I miss you… by Matthew Fang via Flcr CC

It has been a rough week. A good friend of mine who also happens to be one of my Mussar students passed away over the weekend. She was about 50 and has two teens at home. It was sudden and unexpected, and her husband, kids, mother, and the rest of us are quite devastated.

Her husband and I are friends; we’ve talked a few times. It is so hard to know what to say to someone who has just lost so much. “How are you?” doesn’t seem like a helpful question. Legacy Connect offers many short articles that cover how to handle a variety of situations. (Read them here.)

Caring for the dead and comforting the bereaved are two important acts of Loving Kindness. While caring for the dead is something we generally leave to professionals these days, comforting the bereaved is something we can all do. When I was putting the finishing touches on The Spiritual Practice of Good Actions, I came across an article by writer Anita Diamant, who shared her struggle to comfort a friend who lost a baby.[1] Here is what I wrote

“Diamant described being “in mourning” as a parallel universe where being in the shadow of death is not a metaphor. Her friend told her that every gesture of support, even if it was a phone call or email to say “I’m sorry” counted for a lot because it gave her a connection to the living world. Diamant described her struggle not to try to cheer her friend up as she held her hand while she cried. While I have not been in those exact shoes, I know what it feels like to want to cheer someone else up. In part, it is because we want to feel better. It is really heavy to be there with someone who is in such terrible pain. Diamant’s act of selfless Loving-Kindness leaves me in a kind of helpless awe.”

I thought of Diamant’s words often this week, as I just tried to be there. This week I was in Diamant’s shoes, and as I was with the grieving husband. I just listened. Other times, I also needed support, and was grateful that I had people listening to me as I shared my grief  I’m thankful that I have so many friends willing to be there with me, to listen without judgement and without giving advice.

Mussar teaches that there is no escape from the ups and downs of life. We do not have the luxury of retreating and hoping it all goes away. We show up, and do the best we can. It’s nice to have some teachings and guidance along the way. At the end of the day, we all need each other. With the right people at your back, we can live each day like it might be our last, not in frantic haste, but in mindful presence, getting the most out of every moment.

If you are thinking of joining us on our Mussar journey, a good place to start is with the Soul Trait Profile Quiz. Click here to take it now. 

[1] Anita Diamant, Pitching My Tent, (New York: Scribner, 2005), 104-106.

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Filed Under: Featured, Loving-Kindness Tagged With: anita diamant, caring for the dead, chesed, comforting the bereaved, grief, loving-kindness, Mussar, spiritual practice of good actions

Cam Newton’s Humility Is His Greatest Strength

February 2, 2016 By Greg Marcus Leave a Comment

Cam Newton's Humility Is His Greatest Strength
Cam Newton Superman SDG Photoshop Graphic by
SheaDayGraffix via Flickr CC

I keep hearing that Cam Newton is polarizing. Really? I’ve tried to dig around and see what all the fuss is over. All I can come up with is some theft in college, and dancing after scoring touchdowns. Yes, people are upset because he dances too much on the field. Maybe that and he is a black quarterback at the top of his game. (Read more here). It is clear to me that Cam Newton’s Humility is his greatest strength.

Cam Newton is certainly on top of his game. Soon he will be named league MVP, and his one loss team is a favorite to win the Superbowl. Here are three Soul Traits that contribute to Newton’s success.

Cam Newton’s Humility Is His Greatest Strength

It may surprise you that I bring up Humility in the context of someone who is criticized for excess celebrations. Isn’t Humility about being Humble and self-effacing? Isn’t Newton a bit cocky? In Mussar, Humility is about finding balance between meekness and arrogance.

Cam Newton's Humility Is His Greatest Strength
Spectrum of Humility

 

In his book Everyday Holiness, Alan Morinis offers the following Humility mantra “No more than my place, no less than my space.” What is the proper space for a quarterback to have? This is a leadership position, and Newton’s exuberance is catching, and brings his teammates to higher energy. It takes courage and nerve to let it all hang out the way Newton does. It would be judgmental to call Newton arrogant – he talks about his teammates and not his own greatness. The Torah teaches that Moses was the most humble of men. He accomplished great things, and stood up to authority, but it was never about him. You want a quarterback who can step up, and isn’t afraid to lead. And in that sense, Cam Newton’s Humility is his greatest strength.

Order is essential for a successful quarterback

The great quarterbacks prepare. They study tape of both opposing teams and their own performance. They learn the playbook to become mentally prepared.  Newton’s success is a testament to his Order balance. Note that he can’t be too Ordered. Once the foot

Cam Newton's Humility Is His Greatest Strength
Spectrum of Order

ball play ensues, chaos erupts. He needs to be able to adjust and improvise on the fly. Preparation helps, but sometimes you just need to abandon the plan and make the best of what is offered to you.

Enthusiasm governs mindful action

Cam Newton's Humility Is His Greatest Strength
Spectrum of Enthusiasm

Football is a fast and violent game. In addition to his mental preparation, Cam Newton rigorously prepares his body. He explained “if you have 10 reps to do, do 10 good quality reps. Don’t just do enough to say you did it.” He takes the same approach whether it is the regular season or the offseason. It is easy for any of us to just phone it in when we don’t think anyone is looking. The best in the world, however, focus and give effort every time.

Extreme Spiritual Fitness

One of my students calls Mussar “extreme spiritual fitness” because we exercise only one soul trait at a time. Cam Newton takes a similar approach to his physical fitness, working on one limb at a time. He says this is important because a quarterback has to “take many different roles if asked to.” Isn’t that like life too? We are asked to take on different roles at different times, often with no notice. By strengthening our soul traits individually, we are best positioned to take on our next spiritual challenge.

And remember: Every challenge is a spiritual challenge.

Do you agree that Cam Newton’s Humility is his greatest strength?

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Filed Under: Featured, Humility, Order Tagged With: american mussar humility, cam newton humility, enthusiasm soul trait, humility soul trait, order soul trait, spiritual crisis, superbowl

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