patience - American Mussar

My summer vacation is over, and it’s nice to be back in a routine. Actually, I kind of miss vacation, but I don’t miss being sick the entire month of July. Right before I came down with pneumonia, I wrote an article that appeared on Tikkun.org called Join the Mensch Movement. It was after the Democratic sit in in Congress as a protest against inaction on gun violence. I explained that John Lewis is a mensch – he has dedicated his life to fighting injustice. At one point, the Democrats on the floor of Congress started singing “We Shall Overcome.” Believe it or not, I have used that same song to diffuse family situations. It not a go to strategy for overcoming a hopeless moment.

My family was on vacation. It was one of those awful vacation moments when the entire family was bickering. Two teenagers and two strong willed parents can be volatile. Feeling helpless and hopeless, suddenly I started to sing.

We shall overcome.

We shall overcome, some day.

Those were the only words that I knew, so I started to sing them again until the stunned silence was replaced by howls of protest.

We shall overcome.

We shall overcome, some day.

At the time, I was practicing the soul trait of Patience. Mussar teaches that Patience is a gift, to help bear the burden of an unpleasant situation until it is over. For me, it was a struggle to sing or yell, which would have hurt and upset people who were already frustrated and suffering. People I loved.

I agreed to stop singing if we could stop arguing, and carry on without complaint. It was a compromise, a fragile peace that opened a space for us to be together. It gave us hope.

Did anything change from the Democratic sit in? There was still a recess, and there is still no new gun legislation. But for the men in women in Congress who are part of the Democratic party, they were changed. They had hope. Sometimes we need to act. We can’t just sit there in silence and suffer. Sometimes we need to take action.

So in a hopeless place, sometimes all we can do is sing.

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We are pleased to announce that HELP International Uganda, which works to end poverty and hunger in the Ugandan refugee village of Masese, has been given the American Mussar Point of Light Award or their work exemplifying the Soul Trait of Patience.

Recognizing both that problems cannot be solved overnight, and that inaction is never a solution, HELP International Uganda’s work provides immediate assistance and is building paths towards long-term self-sufficiency and success. The people they serve show patience through their hunger and their times of need while gaining knowledge and skills that are helping to build a true and sustainable economy in a village that was thrown together haphazardly from those fleeing the violence of regional wars.

Patience is the Soul Trait that helps us determine when to act, and when we must bear through a bad situation—and the two often occur simultaneously. Too little patience has us charging ahead in ways that can cause further harm, or failing to see the potential of today because we’re looking towards bigger rewards, achievements, or solutions beyond the horizon. Too much patience, and we would never take the steps necessary to make our world better.

HELP International Uganda works carefully to ensure that the aid it provides doesn’t ignore today’s demands, but is always looking towards a future of growth and a strengthened community, as well. This is how it shows us all the true nature of the Soul Trait of Patience, and why American Mussar is proud to donate to their efforts. If you would like to donate too, you can do so here.

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Overcoming a Hopeless Moment the Mussar Way

HELP International Uganda and the Soul Trait of Patience